Rhys Kiaaina

My name is Rhys (Reese) Kiaaina (Key Ah Eye Na) and I was born and raised in Honolulu, Hawaii. I've served as a Minister, Church Leader, and Evangelist for non-denominational churches in Alaska, Hawaii, San Francisco, and Los Angeles and oversaw the work in Maui, Hilo, Guam, Saipan, and Myanmar for over 30+ years. Many in our fellowship call me “The Rev.” I am married to my beautiful wife from the islands, Grace, for 29 years, and have 3 children, Kala'i (means calm or tranquil), Kainani (means beautiful ocean), and Keahikupono (means the fire that will stand for what is right). They are my pride and joy.

 

After 3 decades, I have been in a process of transformational change and been in the business of helping others experience transformational change. If the change isn’t from the inside out, it most likely will not have a lasting effect. Real change isn’t about trying harder but rather pursuing intentional training. If I asked you to run a marathon tomorrow, you could try to run it, but most likely won’t make it to the end. In fact, trying to run a marathon without proper training could kill you! If you trained to run a marathon over a period of time, you have a much better chance of finishing the marathon. Denzel Washington in the movie “Man on Fire” once said, “You are either trained or untrained.” The secret to transformational change is all about pursuing intentional training. Elite athletes have coaches that offer encouragement, another set of eyes to help them see their blind spots and achieve greater results faster. Today, if you are an athlete, business owner, or CEO of a company and don’t have a trainer like a Life Coach, chances are you are not growing to your maximum potential. According to research by the American Society for Training and Development (ASTD), “having a specific accountability appointment with someone you’re committed to increases the odds of completing a goal by 95%!” I have been fortunate to have had much training by different mentors in different organizations over the past 30+ years to assist people in their journey of transformational change.

 

While it has been an honor to serve in the ministry, my journey into the ministry was not pretty. I have been a man who has experienced much grief through loss. By age 1, I was a child of divorce. In the following years, I have seen my mother go through 2 divorces. She is my hero. By age 13, my own pain started me down the path of drinking alcohol and chewing tobacco to numb the pain I felt inside and that year, I tried to commit suicide. Thankfully, I failed. In high school, I had a near death experience. While lifting weights bench pressing, I held my breath too long, passed out, dropped 185 lbs. on my chest, and stopped breathing. Fortunately, I had a spotter who saved my life by catching the weight and hitting my chest with his hand to help me breath again! By the grace of God, I lived. I experienced the loss of my football career due to injury at Portland State University. I dropped out of college by 21 years old and was directionless working odd jobs here and there. Not knowing how to deal with grief led me to more alcohol, harder drugs, and womanizing. I have wrecked every romantic relationship I ever had and have never been faithful to anyone other than Grace, my wife. Do you think it’s a coincidence that I married a woman named Grace and that my profession would be all about teaching about God’s love and grace? People often ask me what brought me to God? In 1991, I was body surfing in less than 1-foot swells with a co-worker at Sandy Beach in Oahu at night. He drowned that night, and the police made me call his mother to come identify the body. I remember feeling numb, lost, and sad that my friend died. Then, 1 decision changed the trajectory of my life. I was reached out to by 2 single adults who went to the Oahu Church of Christ and on March 24, 1992, I made the decision to become a Christian. Since 1993, I have been fortunate to serve in the full-time ministry in different locations with amazing people of all nationalities and cultures. I have been a Christian over half my life. While I have experienced much loss in my life, what seems to be the biggest losses were growing up without a father present in my life, the loss of my grandparents in 2001 and 2006 to cancer, 2 job transitions that were difficult to make, and have experienced 3 church splits that devastated the lives of hundreds of people. In 2019, the last church split was the straw that broke the camel’s back and was the event that brought me to Grief Recovery. It was going through this program that helped me to recover from deep pain from loss and experience true peace. As I have gotten older, I seek peace as I live out my faith and life daily.

 

In the Western world, most people know the word “Aloha” to mean “hello” or “goodbye.”  But this word has a much deeper meaning. It literally means, “the breath of life.” When ancient Hawaiians would greet each other, 2 people would stand close enough to press their foreheads and noses together, and inhale at the same time. They would exchange “aloha” or “the breath of life.” It was a sign of deep respect, humility, unity, goodwill, and love. My hope is that together, we would be on a journey of transformation from deep grief to new life.